Say the right thing when everything feels wrong.
When you’re dealing with refusal, meltdowns, or defiance, the words you reach for in the moment matter. But let’s be honest, it’s hard to know what to say that won’t make things worse in the heat of it all.
This one-pager gives you calm, effective phrases to use when your child resists, explodes, or shuts down.
Created for parents of PDA, ODD, or emotionally intense kids, this guide helps you speak in a way that lowers resistance, reduces conflict, and keeps connection alive without giving up your boundaries.
What You’ll Get
-
15 real-life phrases to use instead of power struggles or commands
-
Focused examples for:
-
Everyday requests (dressing, eating, transitions)
-
Resistance moments (refusal, control battles)
-
Big blowups (emotional meltdowns, rage)
-
-
Why each phrase works (based on nervous system and autonomy needs)
-
Printable 1-page reference (hang it, fold it, keep it close)
Why It Matters
If you’ve ever thought:
-
“Everything turns into a battle…”
-
“They explode no matter how calm I am…”
-
“I don’t know what to say that actually helps…”
This guide is for you.
It’s not just a script. It’s a shift in how you speak with your child, not at them. These phrases give you a way in when connection feels blocked and everything’s escalating.
Format
-
Digital PDF
-
Clean, visual layout with examples + explanations
-
Designed for printing or quick access on your phone
-
Part of the Steady Parent Toolkit
-
Instant download after confirmation
Who It’s For
-
Parents of children with PDA, ODD, ADHD, trauma history, or high emotional sensitivity
-
Caregivers struggling with power struggles, shutdowns, and intense reactions
-
Anyone who wants less conflict and more calm
FAQ
Q: Are these phrases for toddlers or older kids?
Both. The examples are flexible and can be adapted to fit your child’s age or communication style.
Q: Is this a discipline tool?
Not in the traditional sense. It’s a connection-first approach that helps you reduce resistance and improve cooperation without constant confrontation.
Q: Will this work for kids without a diagnosis?
Absolutely. If your child is sensitive, reactive, or easily overwhelmed by authority or routine, this will help, regardless of labels.